shi fu, sorry

sorry shi fu, i'm utterly sorry for sayin to you to treat it as if we never met.

i'm really deeply in lov with you, already ready to care for you and take care of you. i'm willing to take on any challenges and will promise to be a very good bf, but i guess you are not ready and i do not hav any place in your heart.

i remember you told me "mayb 1 day u will be my bf"
i was really happy for a moment, but then turned sad, cos the last time a girl told me this, she ended up together with her ex...

you also repeatly told me "tu di, shi fu noe tu di dote shi fu k"
and "guai k, shi fu dote tu di"
i feel very consoled, but everytime you reject me, those words do not seems important for the moment.

i too remember tt nite when we chat in msn whereby we pressed hard on each's view. i asked for a chance whereby if you were to forget him, can you try to giv me a chance. you said no firmly. i was very taken aback and very very disappointed with myself. i realised i m really nothing when you said no. cos a chance also dun wan to giv.

i noe u r still angry shi fu, tu di really said the wrong things and hurt u le

once again, i noe the damage is done, sorry

tu di lov you very much, dote you very much

I LOVE YOU

無印良品 想見你

疲倦的背包 它不問我是否寂寥 無奈的手錶
孤單地走過每一秒 陽光靜悄悄 街上有人擁抱
我聽得到 沒有人知道 口袋裡我藏著 你的味道
想見你 沒有你 城市再炫也沒意義
熱鬧的全都是你幻影 想見你 心太急
狂奔擁擠的人群裡 多希望 下一秒就見到你
天雖然很高 思念像雲籠罩 我很低潮 我所有沉默
如果你看得到 給我擁抱 微風輕輕飄 寂寞在笑聲裡
默默喧鬧 只有我知道 不需要再尋找 誰的依靠 想見你
沒有你 每天生活只剩呼吸 閉上眼 晃動的 全都是你
想見你 我的心 其實從來不曾離去 這一生只想和你在一起
想見你 沒有你 每天生活只剩呼吸 閉上眼 晃動的
全都是你 想見你 我的心 其實從來不曾離去
全世界最重要的就是你

shi fu cough ok le, tu di is happy for shi fu

back le

went to IMM, shop shop @ Popular and spend my $25 voucher le

then went autobacs clementi, go there awhile only, feel like nothing else i wan to add for my car liao, quite numb too

dunno where to go, still early n do not wan to go hm yet... really scare to c the computer n really scare to log in msn n facebook... really really scare will c wad i c liao will sad de things... hai

so went to HortPark, i tink nite time will more swee ba, day time also v hot de lor... anyway, go there alone also sibeh sian, wan go wif gf next time hopefully

after hortpark went explore the small roads after the park car park, from there look down can c the other part of hortpark, anyway quite confusing the roads there

now i m back le, mayb after dinner will go out again, really do not wan be at hm alone... scare

hws shi fu de cough le? gt better ma? rem to drink cough syrup k. tu di go imm walk walk

blog layout changed

changed the layout of my blog, wanted to give it a new look

went out for a spin

i wandered off aimlessly ard 4+ on 20/9. feelin very disappointed, low, lost, i begun my tour around to some places i've been to and where memories lingers.

my 1st destination was tuas, did not intend to come here actually, cos i jus drove on PIE towards Jurong and did not hav any destination in mind. i drove slowly and reached ard 5+, i then stopped at a bus stop and sat there staring blank n dozed off.

i woke moments later and idea of going to places i left memories hitted me. this is when my small tour starts.

i drove to Lim Chu Kang, did not bring my GPS, and it was quite a challenge gettin here and made many wrong turns and keep coming back to the same wrong place, jus like my lov life. anyway also left my wallet n HP @ home. nvm, lost jiu lost ba, anyway thing wan happen jiu happen ba, jus take me away i tot. finally reached Lim Chu Kang PCG there ard 6+ close to 7 le. stayed there n watch the sunrise, very nice, dunno when will hav chance to bring GF come c wif me.

next destination was Punggol, reached ard 8+. this place nothing much interesting, day time also hot. but i sat down and memories begun to come again. remember we go there c ppl fishing and use net to catch crab, prawn. very hot, i went back my car on engine n air con, sit inside tink where to go next. i dozed off and woke up, suddenly remember today 10am KPE fully open, wan to go c c. it's 9.45 already i remember very correctly.

i rushed to KPE entrance, remember saw got TP still guarding the entrance and cannot go in yet. see that, i slowed down and lane change to extreme left lane. then suddently the barrier open up and TP walked to the side. i was the 1st few to enter KPE fully open! so exciting! i drove all the way thru the whole tunnel. anyway quite boring, cos only can run 70km/h and nothing to see inside the tunnel. but it was real quick to reach ECP from Tampines! my low fuel light up liao, so ll hav to go home liao, cos i dun hav my wallet wif me, HP also @ home. very sleepy, hungry, thirsty. still feeling sad.

reach hm ard 11, tink this is the worst parkin i made, all slanted one, aiya, very sleepy le, nv cared too much. reach hm, jus zzz liao.

woke ard 3pm, went wash up and ate lunch, very headache. still feelin lost n down. i going out to expo to c Super Import Nights (S.I.N). anyway i turned on my HP n saw the 2 SMS, did not reply cos i noe i will say stupid things again, sorry. hope SF nv worry. noe SF safely reached office le.

reached expo ard 4pm, managed to view the drift show before rain started pouring. sian, jus washed car only lor :( another sian thing is i realized my camera low batt le when i started my shooting in S.I.N. double :( :( lor. anyway ok la, clubsnap later sure many ppl post de. walked around to look at the car dress up competition. saw the VIP Pica too, and stayed for the 6pm stage show. they hav some stage games to win Elva concert @ Max Pavilion too. left ard 7pm+ and da bao burger king, next destination is Changi Beach.

reached changi beach ard 8pm, 2day very low tide, still feelin very low too. but i guess i felt better and begun to realized n understand more. found a chair to sit and started to eat my burger king and sms a few frens. still tinkin wan to sms SF ma. really scare will say stupid things again. i guess its better not to meet SF for the time being, cos i still stand firm on my decision. dun wan spoil anything, sorry.

full le, i still hav my fries and coke. i begun to walk towards shelter there, i walked very slowly, seems like taking forever, mayb cos i'm walking alone ba. anyway, along the way some joggers asked me if from here go changi village far or not. i tink far, so i told them abt 20mins walk. they were very happy, smiles on their face. i also smiled @ them when toking to them, tink since early morning, this is my 1st smile ba :) finally decided to sms if SF de cough got better ma, actually since morning i worry abt le. ok, sms ba.

reached the shelter le, 2day the 2 shelters r also vacant. sat @ the same spot @ the same shelter and told myself it was 24hrs ago i started to feel very down after knowing and hearing and the truth jus hits me again n again. heart is so pain. memories flashed back n i cannot control myself n broke down. i m so depressed.

still havin the fries n coke wif me, i finish them all after cooling down and settle down. then i went to wash my face. walked back to car park n stood at our favourite spot. tinking where to go next.

very down again, mayb cos nite time the suffer will come ba. i left changi beach ard 10pm+

i drove to woodlands, wan to get the watch @ pasar malam. but jus drove off after reaching, dunno y, mayb scare will tink of the unhappy again ba. i changed the CD in my car, been listening to the same cd since. mayb the songs also makes me sad ba.

from then on, i jus drove ard n did not alight le. in sequence, i went to:
punggol - no car de, so played my car abit
clementi - long time no go since nv send E
ECP - nothing, jus expressway lo
esso station - low fuel again, car need to drink
home - zzzz

n here i m now, summing all my tots n bloggin... i guess i m clearer now, realized i m back to the start point again. very sad. very tired. all got to start all over again. time will again fade memory. n again i will start another cycle. n again i will fail. n again i hav to fade memory again. n again i will start another cycle. n again i will fail. n again i hav to fade memory again... ... ...

pics to show the places... anyway only changi beach low tide pic is i took de, cos cam low batt le... the rest i download one...



tide low like my feelings


expo for S.I.N


IMM too brings back memories


was the 1st few cars who entered KPE (TPE), and it's real fast to reach Tampines


Lim Chu Kang brings back memories too


Punggol Jetty


Sentosa gateway


from Vivo


from Vivo too (last time took de, also brings back memories)

S.I.N

Keri Hilson Energy

I wish I could rip out a page of my memory
Cause I put to much energy in him and me
Can't wait till I get through this phase
Cause it's killing me
To bad we can't re-write our own history

Such a mystery when hes here with me
It's hard to believe I'm still lonely
Chances fading now, patience running out
This ain't how it's supposed to be

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy
We gotta re-reverse the chemistry
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy
Energy, My Energy
Taking all my energy
Energy, My Energy
Taking all of (my energy)

Seems only like yesterday, Not even gravity
Could keep your feet off the ground when u go to me
How can two be as one
We've become to divided now
There's no use hiding from my misery

Such a mystery when hes here with me
It's hard to believe I'm still lonely
Chances fading now, patience running out
This ain't how it's supposed to be

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy (Oh, Yeah)
We gotta re-reverse the chemistry (We gotta re-)
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy
Energy, My Energy

Taking all my energy (Energy)
Energy (Energy), My Energy (Energy)
Taking all of

Cause your taking all of my energy
I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy
We gotta reverse the chemistry
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy

Now I can feel you changing me
and i cant afford to slip much further from the person i was meant to be
im not afraid to walk alone
not giving up im moving on
before it gets to deep
cause your taking all of my energy

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy (Oh)
We gotta reverse the chemistry (Oh, Oh)
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy (Energy)
Energy (Energy), My Energy (Oh)
Taking all my energy (Oh-Oh)
Energy, My Energy (Taking all of me)
Taking all of

Ya killing me
Ya taking all of me yeah, oh
This love is taking all of my energy

Sri Sivan Temple

http://www.heb.gov.sg/sst/main-sst.html

SG River

Mid Autumn By The River 08